Category Archives: Fear of Hardwork

Fear of Not Being Good Enough.

“I am not ready to do this, I am not good enough.”   Fear of not being good enough

“No man I won’t do it now, I will be a disgrace.”

Have you ever said that before? Have you ever heard people saying that?

What did you feel when you heard yourself or others saying that?

Do you feel curious when you hear that?

For me I do, because the next logical questions are:

When are we good enough? When will we not be not a disgrace?

Before we attend to these questions, I will like to share with you what I experienced during my run this afternoon.

It was 1330, I finally plucked up the discipline to drag myself off my lazy bottoms, to wear my socks, ,put on my running shoes and started on my run around my neighborhood.

I live in an estate that is in its twenties, and I have lived there since I was 8 years old. (Oh yes that will give you an idea, how old I am:))

Owing to its age, it is undergoing quite a major face lift (similar to how we humans do), the residential blocks are given a paint job, previously empty plot are lands are now under construction to build playgrounds and other civic facilities, even the shopping mall in the neighborhod has closed down for a 2-year renovation.

Running while construction projects are on-going can be quite a pain:

“Argh my usual route is closed off, I have to take a detour…..again.”

” That smell, it must be paint. With all that paint job going on, who needs to buy paint to sniff.”

Oops, I just showed the complainer side of me, but hey that’s me too.

After running for a while, I saw a blue print for one of the many projects going on pasted on the metal barricades to shield the construction going on. I was amazed with what was being planned. A park, an exercise corner, a senior citizen corner, a flea market, and a few other civic facilities which I missed.

I had an “Aha moment”. We often admire the beautiful things around us, such as buildings, or painting. At the same time, we also envy the success of others.

How many of us actually admire the less glamorous side of equation?

How many of use see the “dirty, sweaty and messy” construction works that was done before the completion of the building?

How many of us see the countless number of drafts that were drawn and redrawn before the completion of a painting?

How many of us see the hard work that comes before the achievement of success?

To celebrate success and the completion of a project is not complete, we need to celebrate the dirty, sweaty and messy stuff that were done, the many drafts that were made and discarded, as well as the hard work that was put in.

Back to the questions: When are we good enough? When will we not be not a disgrace?

I can’t think anyone can. But what I do know is this: We will never be good until the day

we start doing the “Dirty, sweaty and messy stuff”,

until we start drafting,

until we start putting in the hard work.

As the saying by Zig Ziggler goes: You don’t to be great to start, but you need to be start to be great.

In the past one year in toastmasters, I have taken part in 4 speech contests, humorous speech, evaluation, international(inspirational) speech and table topics (impromptu speaking) contests. I was placed in all of the contests at the club level. In the latter 2 contests, I even managed to even advanced from the club, to the area and finally to the division (The level just before the regional (Singapore and Thailand) final). The best results I have attained ever. I often get this: “Wow, your growth these past 6 months is miraculous!”

To which, I will often reply: “Thanks, its nothing miraculous, this is the result of the hard work that I have put in over the past four years.”

I have gotten my fair share of stick over these past 4 years about my “Not good enough” performance. Along the way, I felt like giving up but my dream to share with the world on my message: “We have a choice!” kept me going. Just as how the blue print of the park: the exercise corner, the flea market kept the construction team on the right track despite all the dirty, messy and sweaty staff that is going on.

My friends, if you ever hear yourself or others say: “I am not good enough.” Please be of service by sharing with them or yourself this quote by Zig Ziggler  “You don’t to be great to start, but you need to be start to be great”If you have started putting in the hard work, and things still don’t seem right. I will like to share with you another saying: Take pride in how far you have come, and have faith in how far you can go.” By Christian Larson. Just as how I have persisted in my toastmasters journey by sticking to my goal.

Shaun

Your fellow human being:)

Fear of Hard Work

How I wish I can be…..!                     Fear of Hardwork

How I wish I can have….!

Have you ever found yourself saying that before?

Each of us have our own…., the…… represents what we want or what we want to be. Maybe its to be rich, maybe its to have someone to love?

My friends, have you ever wondered:

How do we bridge the gap between our wishes and the realization of our wishes?

How do we attain our wishes?

Yesterday, I had a meeting with my support group from the “Living in Passion” Program which I graduated from 2 weeks ago.

During the conversation, my group mate Maggie mentioned about her experience being a support to a friend, in keeping her friend accountable to the goals that were set.

“I used to text my friend: “Good Morning, what is your plan for the day?”. After a while my friend stopped responding.Text after texts, no replies came.

Finally my friend called me and said: ” You know Maggie, maybe I am happy being the way I am.”

This incident with my friend taught me improvement and goals are difficult to attain, it takes lots of hard work. Many people find that they are not willing to put in the hard work to reach their goals.”

My friends, I learnt from this as sharing by Maggie, that to realize our wishes, hard work is needed.

Have you ever been put off by hard work, have you ever feared putting in hard work?

Fear of hard work is one of my greatest fears. For me this fear does not have a symptom, such as shaking of legs, tummy turning. For me this fear works in the background and simply keeps me from even thinking about the things that I need to do.

That sharing by Maggie stirred my thoughts, and the question came: “What is the missing link between my goals and hard work?” i.e.How do I get myself to work hard?

I left the discussion group with that BIG question mark, hanging over my head.

Have that ever happened to you? What did you do when you have the Big question mark hanging over your head?

For me, after a couple of frowning, pondering moments, i knew it was getting me nowhere. I decided to I let the idea run at the back of my head while I continue to do what I needed to do. As they say: “The brain is an answer seeking machine.” I soon found answers from an unexpected source: Facebook. I was looking at some of the latest postings, and I saw this quote from Steven Covey, the late author of the book, “7 habits of an Effective Person”.

It says: “You have to decide what your highest priorities are and have the courage – pleasantly, smilingly, non-apologetically – to say ‘no’ to other things. And the say to do that is by having a BIGGER ‘YES’ burning inside.” The thing that captured my attention was the phrase “a BIGGER ‘yes’.”

I got it:  To overcome the fear of hard work, to make all the pain, the sacrifice worth it, I need a Bigger ‘YES’, a Bigger ‘Goal’! The Goal got to be bigger than all the pain and sacrifices

Then comes the question: “What is the Big Goal?” To me the big goal is that one thing I got to do in order to fulfill my life’s purpose. it varies from person to person, after all we are here on earth for a unique reason.

I starting seeing the Fear of hardwork in a different light.

I see it as a test to see if My goal/wish/want is BIG enough.

With this realization, I will work hard to realize my goals.

My goals are to be:

1) An excellent Finance Manager, that can help the business improve.

2) To create a better life for myself and my family, by building multiple passive income streams via online medias.

3) A public speaker to spread the good word that: “We all have choices!”

The hard work that is expected this month are:

1) Study about the nuts and bolts of the new industry that I will be working in.

2) Relearn and reinforce accounting concepts.

3) Enhance the website “Livewithfear.com” to improve the visuals, and usability, enable Google Adsense on my website

4) Continue delivering project speeches at toastmasters setting, and to earn opportunities to speak outside of toastmasters.

My friends, next time when you say:

How I wish I …….?

Maybe you can ask: Is this a Big Goal? Or is it a nice to have?

If its a Big Goal, be prepared to work hard. If its a nice to have, do you have the time or passion to work hard.

(P.S I will report the status i.e. the results of my hard work at the end of the month under comments.)

Shaun

Your fellow human being;)